Tuesday, December 08, 2009
Trying to Refocus
I still have to work on my intonation. My bow will still skate from time to time. Cello is hard. :)
I'll give you two things to think about going forward.
1) the cello reflects us. I don't know if the negativity is because of the cello, but rather part of a cycle. I find that if I am already negative and not open to dealing with it, then my sound is not rewarding, the physical experience of playing is not good, and then I feel even worse. And although I would never take anything out on the cello, there is a page in my favorite edition of the 5th Suite with a hole in it from a sharp whack from a bow.
2) As you progress, your standards go up. What was once acceptable is not good enough for the more sophisticated ear. Not only that, but if you're not really mindful about your technique, it is completely possible to have a great sounding session one day and a lousy one the next. How? If you do something great accidentally then it's hard to reproduce. That's why practice should be about the details. If you are aware of your technique, then when the sound suddenly tanks or becomes crystal clear "tonalization" heaven, you can see it's because you did x, y, or z.
Don't give up. Just add this experience to the landscape of your cello life. It makes it deeper, richer, to suffer with it sometimes. Practice for me! I'm going to be out of commission with this dang surgery for at least a month. I'd give anything for a magically healed ulnar nerve.
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